nonomella:

my chinese students really love english profanity because they dont get in trouble for it

i try to just ignore it so they don’t get a reaction and keep using it

but today during a creative writing exercise, a character was arguing with a dragon, and the kids needed to decide what the character would yell

this one kid raises his hand and calmly submits his suggestion of “f*ck you, you foolish dragon motherf*cker”

i dont know its just 

its difficult not to react to that

A man flosses, a slave decays!
Rapture Dentist’s Association
elfgrove:

queenanthai:

d0rk:

descepter:

Sir, do you know why we pulled you over?

the dude who kicked in the windshield, also backflipped off the hood of the car. you know he’s waited his entire career to bust out those moves.

I AM THE NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT

Grayson, we know you work as a police officer for a day job, but this is not subtle. Not at all.

elfgrove:

queenanthai:

d0rk:

descepter:

Sir, do you know why we pulled you over?

the dude who kicked in the windshield, also backflipped off the hood of the car. you know he’s waited his entire career to bust out those moves.

I AM THE NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT

Grayson, we know you work as a police officer for a day job, but this is not subtle. Not at all.

captainofalltheships:

Chrys watches GoT [x]

awfulbanter:

seeing people you found attractive in high school reminds you that by some miracle your standards were lower than your self-esteem 

banxx:

huffingtonpost:

Clearly this is the best Ron Perlman doppelgänger. 

It’s Ron…Purrman

banxx:

huffingtonpost:

Clearly this is the best Ron Perlman doppelgänger

It’s Ron…Purrman

Don’t know if anyone will care but I lost 2kg this week, the first week of my push to get in shape for the QPS

wittyenglishone-liners:

bastardlybrendan:

miarosagreen:

youknowyourebritishwhen:

The Definitive Stereotype Map Of Britain And Ireland

HA I’m where the gay people and pensioners are. SO accurate 

"Bit Scary""Mostly Bogs"Superb. Absolutely superb.

My parent are from fake tan and the Wags region.

When I lived there I was smack-bang in Russian Spy territory. Which of course is preposterous…….. comrade

wittyenglishone-liners:

bastardlybrendan:

miarosagreen:

youknowyourebritishwhen:

The Definitive Stereotype Map Of Britain And Ireland

HA I’m where the gay people and pensioners are. SO accurate 

"Bit Scary"
"Mostly Bogs"

Superb. Absolutely superb.

My parent are from fake tan and the Wags region.

When I lived there I was smack-bang in Russian Spy territory. Which of course is preposterous…….. comrade

a-p-h-belarus:

phrux:

adamsforthought:

dungeonsandpendragons:

Commonly confused medieval weapons, a powerpoint by me.

Now stop screwing them up, seriously, or I will put a medieval weapon in your head.

Tumblr is endearing me to being lectured at in Comic Sans

THIS is a WAR SCYTHE, a scythe actually used in combat. Notice it is not a useless piece of shit and is an actual functional weapon.

The only reason why death is pictured with a FARMING scythe is because he harvests souls.

now i can kill ppl and know what im killing them with thank you